Alya Qistina

Friday, January 17, 2014

I love you, uterus

Hello, welcome back my monthly visit! Been waiting for you since your last visit almost 4 weeks ago. So, what's new this month? Anyway, thank you so much for the welcoming party yesterday, it was fun, I was drunk (i.e. crawling in pain) till I threw up and my uterus liked it so much. It couldn't stop partying, it cramped really well until I passed out (i.e. sleep) early last night. Very fun, congratulations. 

Just to let you know, I have received your arrival signs last week. Those migraines and back pains. They were actually giving me hard times since I have few final exams coming up. But I endured it very well. Your enemy called Panadol, they help me to reduce the pain. And I threw up several times too. 

And also, thank you for the welcoming gift where I found myself emotionally and mentally distracted. I cried for no reasons last week. Also, I eat a lot too. Eat instant noodle at 1 am after eating rice at 12 am. My stomach really liked it. But I think Ameerul was a lil bit annoyed, since I mad at him for being late in replying my Whatsapp, which I think not a proper thing to do, well, you know.. He's like the victim here. You are targeting me right? Not the people around me. But he's okay now, so don't worry.

And today, I think the party is still on since the waiters called Prostaglandins are on duty now to make sure that the uterus is still celebrating your arrival, they are so happy that the cramp wouldn't want to stop, even if I try a lot of possible positions to let the pain stop, but nothing has changed. Taking bath also requires a double times than usual cause I have to crawl to get the shampoo. And my every steps also need me to do it in slow motion. Oh, not to forget, well done, I think you do your job really well since I find myself really hurt to just fart out and constipation just make my intestines yell in the toilet.

No, I don't take any medication, I know you hurt me so much, but instead, I'm thankful that you finally come to me, at least you have proved to me that I'm normal and I welcome you with all my heart and let you do your job naturally. For your own future, too! And for your neighbour called kidneys - toxic-free for them, please?

As much as I hate how you torture me, I'm so happy about your visit, every month right on time and be punctual on schedule. You just give me a sign of a healthy body. It's okay if you hurt me, because when the pain comes to me, I know Allah is erasing my sins. :)

 I love you, uterus. Mwah.

Just sharing: Yoga positions to treat the period pain. 
Kidneys must like it, but I think my brain will object this. Ahh, you lazy girl.

No comments:

Post a Comment